My Life, Part VI: Childhood Dream Vs. the American Dollar

So football camp was ending soon. I walked on to the Cougars training camp as if I had played there for the last few semesters. “Amazing” doesn’t even begin to describe how I felt. It was like something out of a childhood fantasy, the kind a kid has when they’re sitting in Giants Stadium, and as the quarterback throws the ball down the center of the field, the crowd goes silent, and you close your eyes and in that moment, in your mind, you are the wide receiver.

I was about to live my dream.

High school football was nothing like what I was about to experience. This was more.

This was where champions on the field were made. This is where Ty Detmer won the Heisman. Going to BYU was going to be a big change, but it was one that I was going to have to make.

I had other offers. Iona was just starting their football team again and offered me a full ride, starting as TE. St. Johns decided to put their team back together as well, offering me an open door. But there was something about going to BYU that made me feel it was the school for me Even if I sat the bench the first year, it didn’t matter. I was there.
From 1972-1992, the year I walked in, BYU went an unbelievable 19-2 (.950) against Utah. During this stretch, BYU solidified itself as one of the best teams out west, winning the college football championship in 1984. During this era, BYU also became the most prominent football program in the state of Utah, while the Utes struggled in nearly every facet of the game. BYU bred QB's in their new air offense like Jim McMahon and Steve Young.

It was unreal, till it all went down hill that same year.

I actually walked in, in the middle of their own "Holy War." The Jewish kid from Brooklyn, walking onto a campus during one of America's oldest and most heated college football rivalries in a school led by the Latter-Day Saints.

In the back of my mind, all I thought of were the what ifs. What if I stayed at Shearson?
What if I listened to all my buddies and went off to all the Gunners of the world? I guess you could call these my, other childhood dreams. I dreamed about it all day long -- money. How was it made? How much could I amass?. Should I go to school in NY and be near the money?

That was when I realized what happened to me next happened for a reason.

That day was the biggest turning point in my life. It was when my life changed forever. It was the day that one dream died…and another was born.

It was all such a blur. It was a scrimmage game against our friendly neighbors, and of course, being the new kid on the block, I surprisingly started. I was playing both TE and DE, drained out of everything that I had left, and finally, by the fourth quarter, relived an old injury and a new nightmare. I don't remember if I heard the crunch when I hit the ground or when the whole team piled on top of me, but I remember the crunch. It was on the 22, a simple Tight End pattern, the reception and of course the freshman starting during a scrimmage shows off.

The next thing I knew, it was all over.

The wind was knocked out of me, I hit the floor, and heard the crunch. I shattered my collar bone and my dreams. It was this second crush that did me in. The first was in my senior game in high school. We played Wagner for the State championship in Staten Island, NY. The same story, the same play, just less agonizing. I caught the ball, ran for 15 yards, got clipped and my pads flipped up. That was enough to weaken my shoulder upon impact. The rest became my turning point in life.


My life changed forever. My search for the game went on, but not on the field. I was going to make something of myself academically. The entire way home I kept my eyes closed thinking of a hundred reasons why I could cry. But, deep down, I knew this happened for a reason. I was sure that the guy up above, the one who I worshipped my entire life, had this planned. Just then I opened my eyes, the bus pulled up. I saw my mother waiting by the curb for me, and I cried.